Comments on: Negotiations Within Ongoing Relationships

By: Gates VP

Gates VP — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 08:55:13 +0000

@Cheap: you know, it’s funny, I was in a “high-ball” situation last year. The seller of software wanted a large sum for a web site he was selling. The boss basically cut the call short and told him we weren’t interested. Ironically, had he quoted a number even close to reality, we were prepared to buy his web site and pay him for his time to build it out for us.

But by failing to be even mildly reasonable, he lost on $10s of thousands of possible work.

By: Weekend Linkage – July 11, 2009

Weekend Linkage – July 11, 2009 — Sun, 12 Jul 2009 03:53:40 +0000

[...] Negotiations Within Ongoing Relationships [...]

By: Mr. Cheap

Mr. Cheap — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 19:35:12 +0000

DGI: Everyone has heard the old chestnut “the first person to name an amount is at a disadvantage” and I agree with you, some people play the game too far and undermine the ability to do a deal at all (as happened in your job situation).

I’ve also had companies try to low-ball me, and like you I’ve walked away. It shows you that they’re going to try anything they can to take advantage of you… I’ve also never had a business deal work out when they tried to super low ball me.

TMW: Yes, employees have countless ways to sabotage employers, which makes it surprising that more effort isn’t put into maintaining a constructive relationship.

By: jesse

jesse — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 19:18:29 +0000

Great food for thought post. Friendships are a lot like business relationships — if both parties don’t benefit in a manner that’s at least fair, the relationship is doomed to failure.

By: Thicken My Wallet

Thicken My Wallet — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 12:53:44 +0000

Thanks for the link and mention. I am often surprised how dishonest potential employers and employers are with their candidates or employees. If the company is in financial trouble, tell them that the business needs to make some adjustments and some cut-backs are part of a larger plan to get back to profitability. In your particular situation, they should have just told you they needed an applications person for a while.

The end result, not that I support this at all, is suddenly employees are stealing, taking off work, going on 2 hour lunches to “get back” at their employers. Payback- its a bitch.

By: Dividend Growth Investor

Dividend Growth Investor — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 12:27:38 +0000

I had an interview several months ago where I was asked about what salary I was expecting to receive. I had done some research and presented the interviewers with a number. They seemed to agree on my number and then the interviewers started talking about how many firms have not only stopped hiring in my field but also given pink slips. I listened to that and then answered that I had actually seen many opportunities present and had other interviews as well ( which is true and the case). It irritated me that they were trying to talk BS to me on the final interview. After that they gave me a job offer, but I told them I had to think about it. I eventually declined to work for them.

I didn’t like
1) No work life balance at the company. Employees were supposed to work more than 5 days/week, and more than 10 hours/day almost every day.
2) The fact that they tried to present the job market in my field in a “gloomy” way, when in fact it was pretty rosy, in an effort to probably offer me less $$$.
3) The fact that they asked me what salary I expected ( which is a lose lose for me, anyway you look at it).
4) Yet another thing was that they offered me a position really quickly. In my work and interview experience, anytime someone gives me an “easy” offer, the work was always something others didn’t want to do. ( work 50 hour weeks at minimum etc)
5) The last factor that turned me off was the fact that I had somehow managed to speak to several employees at the firm as I had somehow arrived at the interview site 30 mins earlier. Based off my conversation with them, they weren’t satisfied with the work load, and a lot of them were in the process of quitting and moving onto better things..

By: Rob Bennett

Rob Bennett — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 12:18:41 +0000

I love your example of how using your great persuasion skills to get your spouse to do the dishes too many nights in a row might not end up being such a hot idea. Humans often are aware of realities that they are not able to articulate. When people are being taken advantage of, resentment builds. Just as all parties win with a good deal, all parties lose with a bad deal.

My boy Timothy cannot understand why his brother Robert is not always willing to play the game “Risk” with him. Tim is better at the strategy of the game because he is three years older. I suggest to him that he might want to hold back on his use of some strategies or share with his brother some ideas for good moves. In the long run this would help both of them enjoy more good times and also help both of them become better players. But Tim of course always feels tempted to go for the short-term win.

There really are deals where both sides are victors. But sometimes at least one of the parties (and perhaps both) is a loser in the short-term. By getting over our focus on the short term we free up lots of potential for life enhancement.

Rob